copyright Bettina Network, inc. 2012
Must tell you about this breakfast. We had a priest and a lawyer at the table and thought this would be kind of boring. However, it turned out to be unbelievable.
I will give you, dear reader, highlights – you dear editor, write too many words when you blog:)
I don’t know how we got onto the subject of marriage because I was in the kitchen – got to cook breakfast, you know. No lounging around talking at the table. I have to catch snippets of conversations.
What was most striking was, it turned around my traditional view of marriage. I thought marriage was a ceremony performed by the Church, Synagogue, Temple, etc. and I don’t know where I put the marriage license which I know is issued by a governmental entity, but I just didn’t think about all of the details until this conversation.
Turns out, marriage is a civil contract dictated by the State. To officiate at someone’s wedding you must be licensed by the State. If a priest is ordained that doesn’t mean he can marry anyone. He/she can only do that if the priest got a license from the State in addition to his/her ordination. Anyone can get a license to marry anyone. You can get a license to perform one marriage ceremony or you can get a continuing license to perform the marriage ceremony for lots of people as an ongoing thing and you don’t have to be ordained to apply for and obtain such a license. Oh – all of my sacred cows are being toppled!!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe I should just stay in the kitchen and cook and stay out of the dining room.
Actually, according to the priest, the two people marry themselves. The person officiating is only there as a witness and doesn’t really do the marrying – it is all between the two people and their community of friends.
The lawyer pointed out that if we had problems believing that then we should recognize that once married, to get divorced that is a State process. If you get ‘divorced’ by your religious institution and re-marry you will be called a bigamist and be subject to the penalties which can generally mean jail time. So, if it were a religious institutions thing to marry you, it would be the religious institutions thing to grant or deny you a divorce.
The priest said his job was to ‘bless’ the marriage. When you go to a wedding and the couple goes off to the sacristy or the small room next to the altar where they are supposedly being ‘married’, that is the point at which they are really married. They sign all the documents and it becomes official. The signing doesn’t have to be done in a side room, but it generally is to take the congregations mind off the fact that this is a State ceremony not a religious ceremony.
Isn’t that something!!! And all the time I thought the religious people were the ones doing the marrying of people. Then why are the religious institutions so upset about this new thing of men marrying men and women marrying women? And – more than that, I now undertand why it was so important for the future of marriage and the shape it will take when Obama came out to give same sex marrying his ‘blessing.’ He can’t marry anyone unless he is licensed by the State in which they are being married, but its nice to have the President of all the States ‘blessing’ marriage. Now I get it!
So what does all this mean? Now that my eyes are open they are taking in all kind of questions. If ‘marriage’ is a state institution, why was marriage as a civil contract so upsetting to the homosexual and lesbian communities? They could have entered into a civil contract just like any businesses or individuals enter into.
When the Church says “what God has joined together let no one put asunder” – does that mean we are equating God to the State? What does a religious institutions ‘divorce’ or ‘annulment’ mean? Since they bless the marriage does that mean their ‘divorce’ means they are taking back that blessing – especially since that is all they do? They can’t break a civil contract so where do we go from here?
How does a civil contract become a sacrement of the Church? Doesn’t this violate the separation of Church and State? Oh my! I could go on and on and on. Would the Homosexual/Lesbian community been better off fighting to redefine the benefits of this State Institution so the rest of us could also benefit? – like – should the benefits of today’s marriage be automatically given to one’s ‘spouse’ – as defined under our current mess of a marriage structure or should the person be able to decide who gets these benfits? – like Who can visit them in the hospital when it is closed to all except close family?, – who gets their Social Security benefits, etc. etc.
The marriage laws in the U. S. were based on the slavery laws which existed before Emancipation of the African slaves – what does that mean for the institution of marriage. All of this fighting for same sex marriage hasn’t addressed any of that. Are the homosexual and lesbian communities fighting for one of their marriage partners to be the ‘slave’ and the other to be the ‘free and superior person’? What for! Or – Is this fight for same sex marriage really a tool being used to change the conversation – from reform of the institution to granting a new group the right to marry and to participate in the same old institution which saw an unbelievably huge number of divorces take place with children, property, etc. all destroyed – and the State Marriage Laws being used as a tool for the redistribution of property to others outside the marriage – like lawyers and their associated helpers in this divorce process? (The lawyer didn’t bring up that one – that’s my question and observation.)
All of these years and I thought the priest was marrying all those people whose weddings I attended and all along that was just not true. He/she was there as a representative of the State – not even there as a representative of their particular religious institution – and the couple were the real ‘ministers’ at their wedding.
What one learns in bed & breakfast is astounding! Wouldn’t give it up for the world.
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Ed. Note: Members of the Bettina Network Lifestyle Community can contribute to the Bettina Network Blog whenever they have anything they want to say and be heard by this fantastic group of people. Send your blog to bettinanetwork@comcast.net or mail it to us at P. O. Box 380585 Cambridge, MA. 02238 or call us on the telephone at 617-497-9166 to tell us what you want to say and we will write it for you.
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Stay Cool on a Hot Day!
Thursday, May 24th, 2012copyright Bettina Network, inc. 2012
Summer is coming and so are the hot days of Summer.
I have found a way to stay cool most of the day and add to my general health and beauty at the same time.
I take a shower and follow it with a massage of organic Aloe Vera Gel. It is fantastic.
I read in your blog where you talked about this massage, but I couldn’t handle it then because it was cold weather when I read it and when I tried to massage with the Aloe Vera I almost froze it was so cold when I tried to put it on my body.
It dawned on me that this might be a great treat for myself when there is hot weather so I waited and just tried it on a fairly hot day. I was very cool after the shower – which is generally not the case for me in hot weather – I will start to perspire almost immediately out of the shower. I was left with a really coolness around me all morning.
I also got many comments from people who told me how great I looked. Since I had on jeans and an old shirt I wasn’t sure where the compliments were coming from – the only thing I did different was the organic Aloe Vera Gel massage. You also talked about Lakewood – so that is what I bought and used. I liked that it was not made from a concentrate, but from the actual juice of the plant and not preserved with a chemical whose name I couldn’t pronounce. So, for what its worth —- and thanks for the blog. I liked being able to send this to you to share. I have my own blog, but no one reads it – except for a few family members and I wanted to share this with a lot of people. It is impressive the number of people who read your blog.
Hope all of you readers try this – it is a great experience. One I will use all summer.
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Learn More About How We Use Your Donation!
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______________________________________________________________
Want to join us? Have a home that you want to open to become one of Bettina Network’s Hedge Schools? Call us and lets talk – or email us.
Ed. Note: Members of the Bettina Network Lifestyle Community can contribute to the Bettina Network Blog whenever they have anything they want to say and be heard by this fantastic group of people. Send your blog to bettinanetwork@comcast.net or mail it to us at P. O. Box 380585 Cambridge, MA. 02238 or call us on the telephone at 617-497-9166 to tell us what you want to say and we will write it for you.
Volunteer with Bettina Network Foundation, inc. to work estate sales; to help move items from one home to another; to contribute your ideas on how we can better use our resources in this effort to relieve and eliminate homelessness and poverty. We also need photographers; designers; and more. However much or little time you have, we are grateful.
Send your event information to be included in Bettina Network’s Menu of Events to: bettina-network@comcast.net
This is a curated blog so you cannot write your responses at the end of each entry. TO RESPOND TO THIS BLOG email bettina-network@comcast.net or info@bettina-network.com
TO LEARN MORE about Bettina Network, inc. try www.bettina-network.com
IF YOU ENJOY OUR BLOG, USE OUR SERVICES TO BOOK ACCOMODATIONS WHEN YOU TRAVEL!
1-800-347-9166 inside the U. S. or 617 497 9166 outside or inside the U. S.
Tags: Aloe Vera, Beauty, bed & breakfast, health, Massage
Posted in Guest comments, Health, Health and Beauty, Making Connections | Comments Off on Stay Cool on a Hot Day!